Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Local man 'murders' girlfriend.

These headlines are not uncommon, unfortunately. I always thought the Surgeon General should declare on the back of bridal magazines,
“WARNING: marriage/relationships may be dangerous to your health”.

After all, if a woman is murdered it will most likely be from the violent acts of her boyfriend or husband. How does love so right, go so bad, so often?

Feminists, theorists, psychologists have been debating this issue for some time now. But despite efforts encouraging public and enlightenment, education domestic violence is – unfortunately - here to stay, and current reports indicate that it is on the rise. One reason given for the increase in domestic violence is the decrease in the performance of the economy, and job opportunity.

With economic pressures weighing down on marriages, violence is often the convenient, albeit wrong, way to blow off steam, and relieve financial stress. However, the divorce rate has dropped in the current economy because couples are unable to support themselves in separate households. What does that mean? It means there are a lot of unhappy and frightened women out there.

Take the ‘local man’ who recently lost his business in a well publicized series of unfortunate (for all concerned) events. The domino-effect of his company’s destruction came down like the proverbial deck of cards. He, himself, admitted in emails, as published in the newspaper, that he was ‘spiraling out of control, and needed help.’

Desperate men do desperate things. So the ‘local man’ starts acting like a bully around his girlfriend, a forty-five-year-old mother of two teenage girls. Allegedly, he breaks a chair over the back of the couch and who knows what else, but it drove her to the point to say, “I thought he was going to kill me.” So, reasonably, and rightly so, she breaks it off with him and files a restraining order.

But a sheet of paper doesn’t stop a killer, and certainly not one who is after his poor ex-girlfriend. So ‘local man’ catches up with his girlfriend last weekend and after an argument on the beach goes to his truck and gets his shot gun. He then ‘allegedly’ takes his shotgun and unloads three rounds into her back. Murdered. Dead. Killed. A brutal act by a selfish beast; who has left two grief-striven children behind to sort through the wreckage of his violent attack on their mother. Yes, they are talking death penalty for him.

If you have a girlfriend who is with an abusive partner offer her support, listen and tell her ‘it’s not her fault.’ Discourage your daughters from dating (or continuing to date – or worse marrying) men who are emotionally, and physically abusive. Don’t look the other way. Maybe it’s time to just say, ‘no,’ to unacceptable treatment at the hand of those who 'claim to love us most.'

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